Rabid monkeys with fancy tools

Here is an entry from the personal diary of Julia Tan dated 1st January 2002 at 1.55am, which was a Tuesday.

Dear Diary,

1st day of the new year. Stayed at home and went online. Din even go out to watch fireworks. Just you wait. Next year. I shall go next year. Managed to record cd-writer. Happy ’bout that.
New Year’s Resolution: Stay away from guys (Julia ‘07: We all know I failed to do that)
New Year’s wish: Master Japanese, Love (Julia ‘07: Failed to do both too)
Kinda difficult, right? We’ll see what this year brings. I hope that the **** (Club name ommited) will stay this close. I doubt it. The better the thing is, the lesser it will stay. C- is going back to KL. N- will start college. V- and D- will have F6. And I, I’ve got school.
One thing’s for sure. I won’t stay in Penang. KL, I don’t care. I wanna go alone. We’ll see if the year changes my mind. I pray it won’t. KL’s always been my choice. Then maybe off to Aus if I take accounts (Julia ‘07: ME? ACCOUNTS? WHAT THE FECK WAS I THINKING?). Well, ’nuff said of studies. Saw full moon today ……. *mundane business about stars and fireworks*

But anyways, the conclusion is … I realised that I’ve always been a bit of a loner. Maybe ‘a bit’ is an understatement. New Year’s eve alone? How Bridget Jones could it get? But you know, having fun depends entirely on the person. Right now, I wouldn’t mind celebrating New Year’s with close friends and family. Brave the jams and assholes throwing firecrackers everywhere? No fanks. Fun is a fundamentally personal opinion, and I believe, even though I didn’t know it at that time, that I had fun staying in, although I was probably the only person in the neighbourhood who was online staring at an ICQ list that was devoid of online contacts. Being alone is not as sad as it seems, because it’s how you handle being alone and, well, there’s always mum when you’re really bored and feeling rather anti-social.

I’ve changed my mind about a few things, like going to KL immediately after F5. Good god, me? Accounts? God forbid! I don’t think I realised how mundane and absolutely boring accounts is (no offence to accountants and accountant wannabes), not to mention hellishly difficult.

I don’t keep in contact with those people mentioned in the entry anymore, although I see them from time to time. It was fun, and would’ve been more fun if I had been less childish and petty. But we learn, don’t we? I hope so.

I wish I could go back there and do a few things differently. However, I wouldn’t change that New Year for anything. I remember sitting down, hearing fireworks go off in the distance, wishing that I was there with someone. I’d go back and tell myself, ‘It’s really not that bad, kiddo.’

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