Rabid monkeys with fancy tools

Oh, and on a sidenote, anyone else who goes for the Muse concert, I’ll pull their ears off.

I swear, I swear, that God is up to something. He’s testing me. He’s testing my patience. He’s testing my balls. Maybe He hasn’t realized that my balls have yet to materialize. Because I haven’t got any. But I swear that He is up to something.
Because Muse is going to Malaysia in February. And I’m stuck here in Cork. Muse. Jesus. Kevin (my cousin) is going to watch it and he didn’t even like Muse before I let him listen to Falling Away With You! This is criminal. Injustice. Pure and utter bullshit, horseshit, dogshit, humanshit, divineshit.
GOD. GOD. WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME. OF ALL BANDS, HAD IT TO BE MUSE? COULDN’T IT HAVE BEEN BRITNEY SPEARS OR MADONNA OR HECK EVEN RICKY MARTIN FOR ALL I CARE?
Watch me while I slowly kill myself with a pencil.

How did I put up with his shit for so long? Owh … And it wasn’t good shit. More like lame ass childish shit. Owhhhhhhh ……….
No regrets. Just a lesson learnt. If I don’t like someone, just end it. And not bear with it till my eyeballs pop out.
I’m a doublecrosser, no doubt about that.

Out of sheer fuckin’ boredom, I shall categorise and summarise all the months of 2006.
January: Angst. Trying to find a foothold in life, trying to cope with suddenly living with 3 other people. 4, at times. And 5 at most. In a tiny apartment.
February: Narcoleptic. Was drinking a lot this month. Went to Korea. Spent Valentine’s day with Fifi. And Dan who joined us later. Began to notice Dan (coz he swaggered in, in a long sleeve shirt and slicked back hair. muhhhhh …)
March: More angst. Whining about my curfew, all those restrictions imposed on me.
April: Strange funny feelings. Kinda like being abducted by rednecked aliens.
May: Back to the past. Going to England again, but the situation was pretty different. I was alone, with no Adrian with me.
June: Back to being single. Broke up with my beloved Dan (the asshole .. hahahah). Started working out of boredom. I’m quite bored a lot, eh. Had a sort of mental liaison. With someone. And stuff. Uh-huh. And most of all .. WORLD CUP SEASON!!
July: Is a month I’d rather omit due to viewer’s discretion.
August: Emo month. Damn emo la this month. Hence my dislike for it.
September: Birthday month. Month when two guys from our little group left for the greener pastures of the UK. They are sorely missed. Also month of a new relationship. Which wasn’t really a relationship. I don’t know what it was, and I don’t think I’ll ever know.
October: Joke month. Started hanging out with Lau & gang. Jokes, jokes and more jokes. Most are lame (don’t tell him) but still I applaud him for being effort-worthy.
November: Epiphanies and depression. Got two of them at once. If it’s even possible. The epiphanies did not do anything to lighten the depressions. But still. It’s weird, I know. November was a good month, nevertheless.
December: Closing time (SEMISONIC). Month of heartbreaking and partying. I love December.
And that’s that. If you’ve been patient enough to read all of the above, you shall be rewarded by instant enlightenment. Be enlightened now. *poof*
No time-refund available.

Of all times my body decides to sprout teeth. It had to be now. And it bloody hurts like hell. It hurts so much, my other teeth hurt as well. Which is making my left jaw hurt. Which, in turn, is making my left cheekbone hurt. And somehow, the fourth (and most recent) piercing on my right ear is hurting too. I have a feeling that it’s connected to the growing teeth on upper and lower left jaw.
The cold is not helping to reduce the pain.
I can’t eat solid food because it hurts like a mother. If I open my mouth too big it hurts like a mother as well.
Oh boy.

… and I properly embarrased myself. I shall never tell that story again. Unless you pay me. My only explanation is that I was COLD. Okay. Don’t ask.
Anyways. I couldn’t understand a word the Spaniard was saying because it sounded Spanish although it was in English. And I got a strange kick out of being the only Chinese in the pub. Strange. Can anyone explain it to me?
Will write more when sober. Now time to shit around till I find the serenity to sleep.
And I probably won’t remember this in the morning.

Having my dinner, like any normal time. My thoughts drifted to my feelings for a certain someone. And whilst I was thinking of him, Mr. Brightside started to play on the radio. Irish radio, nonetheless. Okay.
Anyone who knows me would know that Mr. Brightside is my no. 1 favourite chop-chop song. For those of you who don’t know, shame on you. Tsk tsk.
I pointed out to Pepe le peu that it was my favourite song and he started singing along to it. He bloody knew the lyrics. Bloody hell. HE STOLE MY SONG.
Wokay. Nevermind. About 15 minutes later, I heard Mr. Brightside playing from Mr. Tall’s iPod speakers. In the living room.
Now tell me. Was it a coincidence, or is Fate trying to tell me something?
Theory #1 - That Pepe le peu is choice meat.
Theory #2 - That Mr. Tall is choice meat (hear me gag).
Theory #3 (and be warned that this is rather far-fetched but the theory that I like the best) - Because I was thinking of him, the song played, and it was a form of approval from higher powers. Then just as I was doubting the entire verity of the whole situation, the song started playing again to convince me that I do, I do, I do believe in fairies, I do. No, really, that I do have .. certain .. (fingers won’t type what mind & heart are thinking of) .. f- f- f- feeli- f- f-

ANYWAYS

Watch Gaki no tsukai videos on youtube. Credit to Chong for reminding me that they exist. What a cure for l-sickness.

Okay I’m totally freaked out. Someone took a dump in my toilet and it totally stinks. See, the thing is, my toilet’s outside of my room, just up the stairs, and it sucks. Anyone could use it and I wouldn’t even know. But to face the direct truth of going inside one’s own toilet and smelling someone else’s poop remnants, that’s just absolutely disgusting. Oh god. Imagine all the bacteria. All those germs. Oh just kill me will ya. And imagine I’m the one to clean my own toilet. Hell, it ain’t exactly my own now is it?

How many of you cry out -
see my beauty
                 why can’t you see my beauty
inside, as you pass faceless people on the streets
why can’t they see your beauty
you -
just another void
another disturbance in the air
as you slowly sink into thine own murkiness
nobody will ever see your radiance
nobody will ever see your brilliance
your beauty -
blows away,
gone too soon.

.. and it feels weird to be the only Chinese around. It’s just strange. Don’t know how to describe it.
Goddam I overslept on my first day! Set the alarm to 8 o’ clock. Silly me. Set it to 8pm instead. Was wondering why the hell it didn’t go off.
And the worst thing was - I was at the library for the first time. Climbed six goddam flights of stairs just to get to my department. Sat my ass down and started reading something about Feminist Literature. Then the fire alarm went off. Ugh. UGH.